narcissist: wet blanket soceity [rules on white after labor day]

{contents clockwise: free people + forever21 + max azria + vs pink + united colors of beneton + forever 21}

There are two types of people in this world: Those who are wet blankets & those who are not (water resistant, camping blankets if you will.) And through my interactions with a bulk of this universe, I've had the pleasure of initiating many-a-folk into the WBS (Wet Blanket Society) despite their lack of consent. 

"No Lauren, I can't get frozen yogurt for the third time today with you." WBS! "No Lauren, I can't go out tonight, I have a final tomorrow morning at 8am." WBS! "Lauren, I can't take your shift at work after all, my great-great-aunt just died." Wet. Blanket. Society.

But, the other day I was forced into a game of "two truths and lie" in which I had nothing to match the extraordinaries of Jack's "I was arrested on the campus' football field" or Jenna's  "I have a tattoo of a skull & crossbones on my left ass cheek." My turn led to a embarrassing "Pass..." 

Enter, panic mode: "Am I, Lauren Jerdonek, a wet blanket?!" Here I've been casting Nancys & Neils into the WBS like it's my 9-5 when I myself haven't done anything remotely endangered since I ate dessert before dinner last month. But then, almost as if Coco herself (*moment of silence*) caught wind of my state, the infamous "you can't white after Labor Day" conversation emerged. 

Cue redemption.

Here's my logic on the rule: break it - duh. The banishment myth started over a hundred years ago when day-to-day dressing was much more formal. Whites & lighter hues were worn to make the sun's wrath less harsh. The rule was adapted & eventually turned into a moratorium & unnecessary fashion guideline.

 In my opinion, not only does abandoning whites for autumn & winter slash my wardrobe in half, I can't think of anything sexier than white on white. Matching lace ivories with more masculine knits & jackets makes for an unbeatable combination. Adding a loose combat boot or cinched military jacket celebrates your womanly figure.

So, the lesson I'm giving today is don't be a FWB - Fashion Wet Blanket. Rebel against the norm & wear those whites.

lauren jerdonek.